She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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