glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
