she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Randomize
