I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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