it wasn't lemon gatorade
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
