you guys were way drunker than both of me
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize