I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
