I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
