I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
