Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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