My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
