She just used a chaser for red wine.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
