is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize