he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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