You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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