Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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