Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I cut my penus on the lid.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Randomize
