Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
