Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
