thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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