You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize