When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
