pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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