how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
