He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
