I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
