How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize