do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
