I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
