I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
