what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
