I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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