I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
did i just pee glitter
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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