I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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