Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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