I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
