i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I have tasted many bathrooms
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
