We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I have already put on my inside pants.
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