he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
