I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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