the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
