Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
