I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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