ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i just google imaged poop.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
