adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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