he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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