He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
