Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
