he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
