D3 body, D1 cock
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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