This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
